Thanks to the members who have shared their thoughts with me here and would like to hear from anyone else who has a coping technique for feeling like you are on parade... especially for the soldiers that dont wear prosthetics.
I did read a great article somewhere which detailed a woman who was hosting a famous double leg amputee athlete at her house. Her kid happened to have a horrible facial deformity, and as she watched the athlete join them for the first meal - he walking on his hands to the table and then coming across her kid, she noticed that the athlete stared intently. And then she realized that for a few seconds at least, staring is perfectly normal. Its the brains way of processing new information - something different, something out of the ordinary. The brain is trained to search out new info and differences... and for her son and for the athlete, it was a nice revelation that
at least for a few seconds, a stare is perfectly normal. We're not talking about the intense stares, stalking, pointing here. (As i have seen happen in the company of the wounded soldiers).
Hi David,
MelissaI don't wear a prosthesis, so I obviously get a lot of stares too. It depends on the mood I'm in, I guess. Because I've done some pretty wacky things... or sometimes I just don't even look or notice it. Or I know its happening but I ignore it. This is what I do though. I know pretty much that every time I leave the house I will be stared or looked at. And like you said, it is perfectly normal. I stare at people too. I love to sit in a crowded place and look at people sometimes. It is interesting. So I always make sure I look good and I always keep a big smile on my face! I hold my head high and smile at the world. They smile back. I think a lot of the way that people react is from their own insecurities. The other day, this woman completely looked down at the ground and wouldn't look at me. I thought that was more annoying than the person who looks. Last week a little girl LOOKED UP MY SKIRT and said "where's your leg". One time a "little person" (is that politcally correct?) looked at me and made the BEST face (she was a teenager)... it was a face that said something like, I may be little but I have two legs. lol... And one time, I was having pizza with my three year old daughter and a woman was also eating pizza with her daughter who was partially blind and had other problems too. We were talking to them but I was getting this feeling that she was looking at me as if to say, be thankful you have a healthy girl (maybe I read too deeply into things, I don't know), and at the end when I got up on crutches and my there year old held my hand as we walked along/crutched along (a very tricky feat), she gave me a different type of like that said, "hey, we all have something to deal with, don't we?" I can't explain it, but it was a good eye to eye communication between us. I knew exactly what she was thinking. Or at least I think I did. LOL...
Take Care!
06:43 AM EST