So far I would say you are doing very well under all the circumstances. You are now going down the right path, you are asking questions. The people here on this site can help you figure some of it out, hopefully those with a similar amputation will step up and relay some of their experience to help.

We all go through the depression of "why us?", you just have to get through it and move forward. You can do it, you have gotten this far. Just take it all in stride and keep moving forward.

You mentioned about going to physical therapy, maybe you should consider some therapy to help you with the mind side of the amputation. Not saying you are crazy or anything, but we all need a helping hand at times, I know I did.

You may also want to talk with your prosthetisist or get on the American Coalition of Amputees web site and see if there are any support groups in your area. And always remember you have us here.

Donof -

Read your comments in your section about yourself. You say you are "too stubborn to give in"... is this so? If you are as you have described yourself then take action, get involved. You are too young to give in. Since my accident I have gone back to doing the thing that gave my life purpose. If you find your drive in life then you will overcome any adversities that you may face. If you flounder around looking for the old you, you will simply be a speed bump for someone else to roll over.

Take care of yourself and reach out to Jean and tell her what you are going through. No one can understand what you are feeling inside if you don't describe where the pain is coming from. You are going through a full gamet of emotions from denial, questioning why me, physical pain, psychologial pain and what is probably the hardest to deal with is fact that even though people see you as the same old you (the person they loved being around) is that you do not see that person standing there. He is still there, only change is physical and your true friend have come to overlook that because they still like the guy inside. Don't drive them away. Invite them into your new life and asked them to help you where they can. They will.

Hi, I may not be the right person to be giving advice but reading your blog just couldn't stop me from typing away...it's definitely hard for regular people to understand how we truly feel, to really know how we truly feel and definitely easy for them to say they understand. I wouldn't say you should socialize or party if you dont feel like it or be normal when your physical state and emotional state say 'not yet!' Right now, follow your heart, what gives you peace...some time alone? a hobby? Something you enjoy doing? Go for it! It's only you who can create your own happiness for the moment. What you do is no one's business as long as they're not bothered, hassled... Whatever relaxes you and puts you at ease, feel contentment..seek that. Had I grown wiser 13 years ago I would have spared myself from a lot of heartache...it's no good!

I sort of know what you are going through as I have had some of those thoughts lately. My amputation was almost one year ago. Yes, for the first year it is a novelty to you AND your friends and family. Then it seems all of a sudden it is just natural to others except yourself. I have had some of those experiences lately and even had some tears over it but then I try to do something I enjoy.
I do have a couple advantages as my husband is very supportive and I made a really good friend in the hospital when I had my amputation as she was having the same amputation as I had. So talking to her almost weekly really does help.
As one of you commentors mentioned, it would be very helpful for you to find a support group that you can talk to. It does help when others know what you are going through.
Hopefully, at least, this site will help you.